Poison Control

My two year old is killing me. He likes to eat anything disgusting and poisonous, and the mere fact that it tastes like crap sure doesn't stop the likes of him. I was out sweeping the front porch real fast this morning, and mistakenly asked the 6 year old to 'watch him' for a couple of minutes. She was doing her hair. Which means slicking it down, headbanding it back, and admiring herself in the mirror. I should have know she was too busy for such a menial task. She totally had better things to do. It is not her fault. I just should have tied him up with some rope before stepping outside. I came back in and heard Carter crying loudly 'It's too hot! IT'S TOO HOT!' I came into my bathroom to find him sitting on the counter by the sink emptying my Mary Kay Acne Treatment Jel into the sink. I assumed he burned himself with hot water until after further speculation saw that his lips were becoming burnt and bright red. I asked him if he ate some. He said pathetically 'Yeah mom.' Whimpering all the while. I called poison control for the bazillionth time on this child and they told me that benzoyl peroxide would not poison him (just for your information) but to rinse out his mouth, and wash his face, give him some milk and or water and he should be fine. Ahhhhh, sweet relief.

That was until about an hour later when he started screaming and writhing on the floor in pain. He kept repeating loudly 'I'm gonna frow up! My tummy hurts!' and kept laying on the floor. I finally got him calmed down and he took a little nap, but then came into my room about an hour later in extreme pain and repeating the same things. I went into the bathroom and upon further inspection, found a bottle of microderm abrasion open and drips coming down the side (It was behind my big basket of face-wash type stuff on the counter). I then assumed he must have ate some of that too. Of course, why not taste test another disgusting thing? Well, then I freaked, because it was 4:30 on Saturday afternoon and I didn't want to end up in the emergency room tonight. Chris is out of town, and I would have to pawn off kids on unsuspecting neighbors and then there is the sad fact that we currently don't have medical insurance and large unpaid accounts at the hospital, and doctors office. I of course don't want to add to them. So I donned my baseball hat, and made all the kids get in the car.

There is only one word to explain our appearances. RAGAMUFFINS. The whole lot of us. I was in my sweatpants and some retarded mickey mouse shirt that barely fits over my big pregnant belly. Carter had no shoes on. Bailey and Jake had been playing out in the dirt for the past two hours. We looked like homeless people. I just panicked and ran. When we got there, they called poison control about the other stuff he ingested because now Carter had a fever of 101, but they found out the fever should not be related, and good news is, he would not die. Hopefully he is just starting a little flu bug or something. I just hate it when stuff like this happens.

I am so tired today. Jacob has so many medical problems right now, and as many of you know is a serious spontaneous barfer. I feel so bad for him. And I feel so bad for me. It is so embarrassing sometimes, and I don't think you ever fully embrace the cleaning up of barf. I will just say this: I love my hardwood and tiled floors, and even more, I just could kiss whomever invented plasticized mattress covers. I could just kiss you whoever you are out there. We ran out of one of Jacob's medications this week, and when that happens he gets on this non-stop coughing kick and literally cannot stop around the clock. He then of course, barfs because of all of the coughing. Nothing helps. He plays outside, which makes him cough and barf, and it is hard to send him to school, and even worse, no one sleeps at night between Carter coming in to get me, me having to go pee fifty million times, and Jacob's incessant coughing and hurling. I am so tired of changing sheets and washing out barf bowls.

Don't get me wrong, I love my 3 little ones, I really do. They are the greatest joy in my life, and my biggest challenges some days. And some days, I just want to pull the covers over my head and not have to face the hardships that come with being the mom of little ones. It has been one of those weeks that I so badly wish our work situation and life situation were different, and I am so tired of being a single parent. It has been months of this now, and I am seriously worn out some days. Physically, yes, they are so busy and into everything and so messy; but emotionally it is even more wearing. How can I possibly give them all the attention, love and encouragement they need? How can I be patient and gentle and kind, keeping in mind they are just little, and will make lots of mistakes? (Don't we all?) I just appreciate my husband so much. He does so much for our family. He is my rock, and I realize it all the more when he is gone and I don't have someone to buffer my impatience and bad moods with my kids. I bet they really miss it when Dad is gone because Mom is mean and annoying!! Poor kids!